April 2012
0 posts
March 2012
19 posts
Oh Creed
- [Creed pulls into the parking lot and goes into the office]
- Creed: Sorry I'm late, boss. What's going on?
- Michael Scott: [accent] Sir, there has been a murder, and you are a suspect.
- Creed: OK. Hang on just a second. Let me just settle in and I'll be right back.
- Michael Scott: Very good, very good. Now, no one was there in the wine cellar.
- [Creed gets in his car and drives away]
Whore-ible
- Frank (sarcastic): Oh, no! I'm not gonna make a scene! I was just told, excuse me, that my HORRIBLE, WHORE WIFE has tricked me into raising two bastards for thirty years, and I'm bein' asked not to make a scene! (He goes over to a nearby table.) Did you bang my wife? Huh? (As he goes over to another table, Dennis and Sweet Dee are mortified, while Barbara is just annoyed.) Did you bang my whore wife? (Addressing the room in general) Does anybody here have any illegitimate children with my horrible, whore wife THAT I SHOULD KNOW ABOUT?!
- Barbara (annoyed): Jesus, Frank... Frank (really losing it now): JESUS, FRANK! JESUS, FRANK! JESUS, FRANK!!! JESUS!!!
- Frank: My life is a lie! My life IS A LIE!!!! (His gaze turns back to their table and he lunges for a fork. Completely unhinged) Somebody's gotta get stabbed! SOMEBODY'S GOTTA GET-- (Frank freezes in mid-sentence, almost as if he's been hit by something, gurgles feebly, and falls straight to the floor, taking the tablecloth and everything on it with him.)
